cirywen

Poor reader. You who have persevered thus far. Why do I talk to you? I was right in saying Delinor has a stronger heart than I. I tire of the webs of deception and the masks. Albeit for different reasons. But what should she do to me if she learnt that I had cut off Theroneth's head? He was in my employ for a goodly long while. That I hunted her old associates. That I killed the man in cold blood for naught but the crime of playing an influence in the degeneration of my father's path. Being one of the primary instigators I believe. Wouldn't it have happened anyway?

Today I had an encounter with an odd fellow. Though I do not know his name, I know he isn't too fond of my pies, or rather the pies that I brought along (I myself do not know how nor wish to make a pie myself, for I have vowed to only eat them, and eating them is all I will ever do). Anyways, this odd fellow, let's call him "Oddly", he was at the house of this nice girl. Her name is Cirywen, she once dated my boy Eordion, though I wonder if that love will ever spawn a baby. I guess not...

Today has been a strange one. I woke up this morning to Cirywen sleeping soundly in my den of sin on the bear rug she has so chosen to name 'Mister Bear.' Now hold that thought.

You can't actually make this up, the one girl I suspected of nefarious leanings seems to simply just potentially be innocent. Whereas I am now informed that Kríea is a con artist with a high price on her head for her crimes in Dale. The man could have been lying of course. But as I stood over the ditch that is to be his final resting place. How could he have been? What purpose does it serve. Madness, absolute madness I tell you. This is the girl who I know for a fact to be naive, foolish. He must have been lying. He must have tricked her into his work.

I woke up today with a pounding head but I felt significantly more well rested as the morning wore on. Last night I had such a fright, Taala could have very easily read my book though I do not know as she would violate my privacy in such a way. Within these pages are sensitive matters. She very nearly could have read them all within the space of an evening. I suppose I am fortunate she was worse off for the mead. My innermost thoughts, bound in fetters. She could have been privy to them all. If not them all, Then a very great deal. I have been so vulnerable.

Dear diary, has it really been a week? I do apologise for neglecting you so. It could be worse. I have left you a year before. A man has had much business to take care of. Contracts to fulfill, babies to clean up after. And girls to avoid. There are some new recruits in the Dawn. One of them particularly obnoxious. I said nothing. He will learn how the game works or he will be gone. But I am also conscious of something anew all of a sudden. I have superior officers these days. Fancy that. Though they treat me with the utmost of respect and do not order me around like cattle.

My little boy has just drifted off to sleep. It is time to return to the manor untill the morning comes. Absently in my mind I cannot shake the thoughts of that infernal girl out of my head. I am far more aloof than I once was. Perhaps not as convincing in keeping people off the scent that my mind would be troubled. But I have started not to care, my priorities have changed. I spoke with Delinor who goes by the alias of Katey and made a quiet inquiry or two. If she could see in Cirywen the very same qualities of the woman she once hated as well as I did.

Ah, the wailing of babes. Is there any wonder I am going out of my mind unable to think. Sweet and gentle Kríea, I still do not know how she views our relationship. It was never formally so or ever spoken of. She is so unwell she has hardly moved from bed. I forgot what it is like to be woken at all hours by infants. That is the only reason I touch you, you infernal book.