Abrianna

This is new to me, new to us both but I do not shy from it, and as far as I am aware, neither does she. We never expected, thought for one minute that things would turn out this way but I am so thankful that they did. This is how I always dreamt things would be, never before have I had a dream come true, and of all of them; this is by far the one I am most grateful towards.

We never thought for one minute that things would turn out like this. It has come as a suprise to us both, but a pleasant, very-much welcomed one. We took a trip to the North, to replace bad memories with good ones and we have succeeded; that day shall remain in my heart forever.

She brings out a side of me I did not know existed.. Never before has anyone had such an affect on me. I lose count of how many times someone has mentioned how such short shrift I give people. And how aggressively short my temper is. She has a way of taking that all away. I feel calm, invincible perhaps. When she is gone, I find myself weak. But when she is here.. I am stronger than ever.

I have spent so long dreaming of recent events. So many restless nights, thinking about her, about us. At long last, I dream no more. She is there, when I wake. She is there when I return. She is there when I need her.

I am out. It has taken me all this time to realise, that rotting between the planks of the stocks, awaiting the hangman's noose is not the way I wanted things to be. A friend of mine, who I find myself to miss now more than ever; told me to make the most of life. That life is what you make it, but I should forget about Abrianna. I cannot, and I will not try any longer.

 ''I try to write as often as I can, but lately it was not in my power to create the time to do so. Therefore these pages have remained empty for several days, perhaps even weeks.

 ''Her chest moves up and down in a graceful manner. It is only hours ago that she was coughing up blood and it seemed to be her last moments. She even asked me if this was death, if this was what death felt like.