Concerning Bree-Land: A Hobbit Guide to Tourism
A guide regarding newly adventuring Hobbits & tips on the best picnic spots
By
Dandedill Dilly Doffin
Concerning Bree-Land
As I sit here on a gentle slope overlooking Bree-Land's festival grounds, under the sturdy branches of an oak tree, I cannot help but admire the vast countryside that surrounds me.
Bearing great likeness to The Shire, this land consists of lush rolling hills & familiar wild beasts such as wolves & bears that roam the grassy terrain.
This is not to mention the many ruins that scatter the landscape, eerily marking what once was. Although plenty still lay abandoned and lifeless, I hear tell of savage bandits hauling up in such ruins and could not rightfully advise these interesting sights to be an ideal picnic spot.
As well as the grassy slopes, Bree-Land is also home to a vast bog by the name of Midgewater Marshes which is situated towards the south east. As the name suggests, the marshes are home to swarms of biting midges. The thought of midges,bogwater & soggy toes is frightful enough, without mentioning the large ghastly spiders which also inhabit the marsh. This boggy marshland is a poor picnic spot by any means & ought to be aired on the side of caution.
The Old Forest lies towards the southern side of Bree-Land, a vast inhospitable gloomy territory that ought to be steered clear of, at all costs. A damp heavy mist covers large areas of the forest & thick coatings of lichen hangs from trees, which is said to be rather alike of beards. It should be noted, neither deer nor fawn roam this woodland, only monstrous spiders, starved bears & resilient wolves. Folklore tells of a river-maiden who is thought to have settled by a charming & peaceful lake towards the northern side of the Old Forest. Perhaps there is beauty to be found, even in the most dark of places.
Another story tells of menacing oaks that trick lost adventurers by uprooting themselves & shifting, cutting off paths that had once been open. Within the Old Forest, To the east of Buckland lies a clearing, it is said to be a site of great historical importance & that many a brave Hobbit had once cleared the area from the roots upwards. This miserable woodland may be one of the most dangerous regions in all of Bree-Land. In fact, a spot of munch here would certainly result in death, which never quite makes for a good picnic.
Perhaps the most awe inspiring sight of Bree-Land is it's great lake by the name of Nen Harn. Nen Harn boasts a handful of small islands, one of which is said to hold the remains of a ruin. I presume the lake would be ideal for those few amongst us bearing the ability to swim. This delightful area is a fine spot for a picnic & has not been deemed particularly dangerous, unless you have a tendency for drowning.
While mostly inhabited by Big Folk, Bree-Land proves hospitable to many a hard-working Hobbit.The charming farming village of Staddle, just feet from the gates of Bree is home to plenty of fine Hobbits, as well as Buckland which is situated on the banks of the Brandywine River. The Hobbit’s of Buckland tend to be of another sort, with a few even being capable of swimming.
Other small villages include Combe & Archet, both of which lie north-east of Bree.
A curious pond is said to be a short stroll from Staddle & Midgewater Marshes, tucked away behind dense foliage. Good honest folk of Staddle believe it to be enchanted & cared for by a mysterious wisewoman who has rarely, if ever, been seen by the likes of neither Big Folk nor Hobbit. Should it be found, it would surely make for a fine picnic spot.
Concerning Bree
The heart of Bree-Land is of course, Bree. A large village occupied by both Big Folk & Hobbit alike. Bree itself is a slight underwhelming. The cobbles are filled with dips & cracks that give way to puddles during each rainfall as well a particular stench that could only be explained by the village's many horse stables.
The famed Prancing Pony is situated towards the north-east side of Bree & is said to entice visitors from far & wide. A band of merry musicians can most likely be found playing just outside the renowned inn while Barliman Butterbur serves rowdy patrons inside.
Bree comprises several quarters or neighbourhoods, namely: Market Square, Beggar's Alley, The Stone Quarter & Oldstone Ruins. Market Square is the centre of the village & connects many paths. It is home to the famed Boar Fountain & is said to be a symbol of Bree’s strength.
Mudgate, the suitably named entrance, gives way to the neglected Beggar's Alley. What a sorrowful sight it is too, the Big Folk dress head to toe in rags while children run amok amongst the rubble and ruins. The buildings are-
-run down, with broken windows seemingly a regular occurrence. It is clear these poor folk are going through tough times, nonetheless, I must advise against my fellow Hobbits wearing their best attire in this particular quarter.
A small community of sturdy Dwarves dwell in the Stone Quarter. Beside discussing one another's facial brushes, the reasoning behind the stout folk's business within the walls of Bree remains unknown.
The Oldstone Ruins quarter, as the name suggests, is a ruined section of the village. The architecture of these ruined structures bear a great likeness to the various ruins scattering the landscape of Bree-Land.
Concerning Trade & Facilities of Bree
Much of Bree-Land's trade takes place in Bree, where stalls are not fixed to one area but can be found all across the village. The Big Folk seem to be a fan of "halls" and have many different types of such, notably the town hall, crafting halls & a rather miserable sounding training hall. In addition to these, Bree is also home to a heavily guarded vault, jam-packed auction house & several cluttered crafting halls.
The village also holds a jail, a huge imposing building with solid iron bars throughout. In the courtyard stands several unknown wooden structures each containing three sizable holes. A rather fearsome sight. I hear tell of prisoners dwelling within the jail’s secure walls, where they live, day & night behind iron bars.
I do believe, there is much to be said for Bree-Land of which cannot truly be experienced through these mere flimsy pages alone.
Many thanks to my wonderful guides, Arindiis & Solveij who provided me with their utmost protection, extensive knowledge and grand company through The Old Forest.
- Dandedill Dilly Doffin
At long last, Brandywine Bridge, where your adventure begins...
(All “drawings” are edited in-game screenshots taken by me and all words are my own. Very few copies of the perhaps "controversial for Hobbits" guide can be found IC in The Shire's Great Smials' Library. More copies can be found IC scattered around The Shire in various bookshelves - Hope you enjoyed! Had a lot of fun doing this!)
