The corner of the bedchamber was the brightest of spaces in the house, brighter than the dying fire that spat embers every once in a while. The glow of a cluster of candles upon nightstand lost a little of their intensity as their light became absorbed against the darkly painted wall. The warmth of the bed was met with the warmth given by three goblets of wine, though the result of the drinks consumed and those that would follow would be quite uncomfortable in the morning, a feeling she knew all too well of late. The dog snored, sprawled out on the bed beside her, a position once kept for the bard, though she preferred the hounds company, for it was loyal and joyous upon seeing her. Lazily she wrote in her book, her words difficult to come by before now, even if she had much company to share them with, but with no company that eve other than the sleepy, hairy companion, she proceeded to commit her thoughts to parchment.
Bard, how dare you? how dare you open year upon year of thoughts to me, private, treacherous thoughts written down such as this, on parchment and present them to me as casually as if presenting me with a cup of herbal tea! You then disappear to goodness knows where, a whore probably and return to speak to me as if I were the one at fault! Yes, yes you are impotent! You took advantage of my coin, you made yourself a position in my home to be waited upon, where you need not lift a finger and could have all you wished by simply taking from my coffers! Then, you have the audacity to propose a union between us?! After the cruelty, after the passing jibe of calling me a bitch?! How dare you! May your sisters beat a civil tongue out of your mouth before you dare speak to me again! I bent, I twisted, I broke my ideals to fit to your mould! I even resided in –my- home, a home ruined by blood, by death, because –you- would not let another man drive you from what you called your home! You are a selfish, arrogant, spiteful man, one I did say long ago that I would wed, one I did say I would gift a child, but with these revelations, one I can barely think upon without my blood boiling! I loved you! Love..loved..we have been together for so long and it would seem I was living a lie, led to believe what we had was true, I cannot think on it now.
The quills nib splayed out on the page, spilling ink in an unsightly blob beneath the impeccable writing. Her temper found anew, she quickly grasped at the nearby goblet to drink deeply from its content.
Gerlof, for the love of the stars above, stop being so ridiculous and tell that lass what you feel or move on! Our business is not as I wish, it is marred by these distractions and it cannot be so. I have formulated a perfect tea that will sell well, perhaps you should be making more effort in selling it than drinking at my home..
Pausing, she rested her head against the thick, carved headboard and closed her eyes, calming herself a moment before resuming
...I enjoy your company in truth, it is crude, but honest and you have no desire for me other than my apothecary skills. Egoldir is a quick learner, one who seems keen to embrace the more unsavoury side of my work, yet even he brings difficulties to my doorstep. He is only a little younger than I, but he has the passion required to do many great and terrible things with the knowledge I share. Geirdrifa? A man from my past, fair of face, strong of body, a stranger to these lands who seems devoted to them, far more than he is to his wife for he still persists in trying for my affections. I admit, temptation is there, not for a glorious romance, but simply for comfort and enjoyment, again, I cannot think on this, if I think then the anger returns, then I hear my mothers words harping in my skull, gnawing away at my innards.
Reaching for a bottle, she drained the very last of its wine into her goblet, ensuring every single drop fell into the bowl before stacking the bottle with care alongside two others upon the floorboards. Glancing over her words, she then proceeded with her final musings
Little, strange, twisted wretch of a woman. Do not spout words to those willing to hear, I hold the guard in my palm yet there will always be one who takes the moral high ground. I will not hesitate to ensure my livelihood continues unobstructed.
