I had thought to wait a few more days, to spend a little time with Daigan, Blodwynn and Baradar before leaving, but that was not to be.
Saelran put in an unexpected appearance. This is the second time he has visied me here and I still wonder as to why. Is it for Davick that he comes? Is it for himself? Does he enjoy the company, however brief, or is he merely nosey enough to take an interest for all that he barely knows me?
The last time he said that he had merely been passing by. This time there was no such cover. He agreed that he had come for a reason but would not state outright what that might be. Instead, he asked many questions.
Talk of Daigan led to the mention of Davick. He was rather interested in my reaction to the mention of that ones name; this makes me suspect that Davick was, indeed, the reason that he came. However, the news he gave me of his son was terribly worrying. I am of the opinion that he meant to share this with me all along but, clever man that he is, wanted to gauge my reaction ahead of time. I also think that he knew what I would do once I was informed of the situation, for all that he advised me against this course of action.
How can I heed that advice though?
I have tried so hard to forget about him, or rather my feelings for him. I have tried so hard to push them aside, place them out of mind and heart, but it is difficult to do so when people continue to mention his name to me. I have tried, I have.
I know what I should do. I should take the wisest course, turn a deaf ear to this news, turn a blind eye to what has happened. I should shrug and get on with my own life. However, I cannot do so. How can I turn my back on the man I love? How can I walk away when he may be in danger? How can I ignore this?
Love is stupid. It is blind and deaf and dumb. It causes us to do the most irrational things and for all that I am aware of the absolute lack of wisdom in my actions, still I will follow this course. I will return to Bree-land, a place I had never wished to set foot again, and I shall seek him out. It will not be easy for how is one meant to find a man who does not wish to be found? I will do so, though. I have to. There is no other way. Even if there is naught I can do to aid him, at least I will know that he is alive and well.
