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Fear and Misgivings



Estarfin did not acknowledge his friendly smile, and turning on his heel, strode off to speak with Nirhen in private. Certainly, thought Parnard as he watched the two elves confer, the conduct of Lord Estarfin has been very rash; but the discoveries I have made will clear the way of such malevolent agencies in future, which have led him into his present difficulties. It was, however, very melancholy to reflect that his grim-faced friend might misunderstand his helpful intentions. A sudden fear seized Parnard’s heart, when he considered that he might have made a grave error by volunteering to take on himself the office of Lord Prosecutor.

I took the earliest opportunity I could to do this, but now I am aware I do not possess any experience of prosecuting anything whatsoever; at the same time, I cannot regard myself as totally unqualified, nor deficient in my service to the House, since I have long made its service my particular study. My chief pretensions were founded on a sense of what I could do to help Lord Estarfin, and the more elevated my situation has become in the House, and the ties of friendship stronger, so my efforts of zeal to help have become greater. I confess, that if my friendship to Estarfin was not so great, nor my duty to the House was not so paramount, and seeing things set aright before Lord Anglachelm, then I would have preferred to remain a passive spectator of the Court, potentially a scribe. Thus I was influenced to make my offer of service to Lord Anglachelm, and though I did hope that his Officers would attach to the position of Prosecutor some value, and perhaps make me a Lord - that is not why I asked for the position! - I hope Estarfin and the others do not see it that way! The Ambassador fretted inwardly at the great service which Anglachelm, Lord of Bar-en-Vanimar, had rendered him, and extolled him in his heart as the most generous and courteous lord in the world – but thought that while he might find some way to shield Estarfin from punishment, his Lordship’s new appointment may have forever changed their friendship, and Parnard wished that Lord Anglachelm had, this one time, not been quite so generous.

It was about this time that Golosbrindi the maiden was hoping to attract the attention of some of the men of the house, and approaching Parnard with a disingenuous grace, asked him to dance. Now, that part of Parnard, the part interested in dancing with beautiful maidens, had long ago been lulled to sleep, and the rest of him, being preoccupied with thoughts of the trial, refused her request with a courtly, yet firm politeness which would have deterred most maidens from proceeding any further in the attempt, and have induced them to relinquish the task as a hopeless one. Not so, however, the plucky maiden Golosbrindi. With every refusal, her spirit became more determined, and her attempts to cajole him to dance more plaintive. She would see this elf dance with her. The amiable Ambassador would be numbered amongst those unfortunate victims who had already fallen prey to her inordinate appetite for dancing. There, she could tell he was wavering now: Lord Tindir was nodding at him to dance, and his wife Himwen was smiling and beckoning as she waved him on the dancing floor. Well, I should not like to commit such a piece of rudeness towards this pouf-sleeved maiden who does not know me, thought Parnard, though this trial business presses so heavily on my mind, that I find it impossible to evince any enjoyment of the gaiety of the Hall. But I shall pretend, and she will not know any better. He stepped forth from the corner and smiled, and like a little cloud the cares of the day faded away from his face, and soon vanished.