I slept well, I were surprised too, but no, slept right through till the afternoon! Then again it didn't help having Mister Eighty visiting till almost the crack of dawn. I've woke up feeling alive, free.
Every blimming person who spoke to me, over a dozen, about Elias and I, said the same, their advice almost identical. He be a child, he ain't wise enough, ain't ready to court anyone, that he be in the wrong, his head be soft and even give him ten or twenty years before he might be mature enough. I wanted to take it with a pinch of salt, that their concerns were just what they would do if they were in my shoes, but no, I see now.
They're right, all of them. I mean, I were sat there, in his work and this lass comes in and were like, oh you're so wonderful, oh we'd miss you, you're the best doctor, all the fawning over him made me almost throw up my tea. Go ahead lass, enjoy gawking at a lad who wont care a jot about yourself, he said once that everyone just be flesh, he wont love, he doesn't look at you like you want, same with Rue, she be just an experiment, a nasty, slimy experiment that will end up breaking him.
I'm free. I don't care that I gave me heart to him, it'll heal. At least I don't have him trying to convince me it be alright for a strange lass to sleep in our bedroom, or that it be alright if she touches him. I'm finding meself a new lad, no guilt anymore, no putting them off because I were with him, he wanted it over, it be over.
