A letter inside an unmarked envelope once sealed with Landrem the Younger’s personal seal—the Tengwar letters ʟ⋅ɴᴅ⋅ʀ⋅ᴍ beneath a fish naiant. The author’s hand is crisp and elegant if small and understated, reminiscent of a careful scribe’s.
Mae,
I will preface this by saying thank you again for visiting me. It was unexpected but greatly appreciated, and filled me with much joy. In addition to that, I finished the book. I enjoyed it very much, and thought it quite entertaining. You have always had very good taste and this time was no exception. I hope you enjoy the one I have sent you back in turn equally as much.
I hope you enjoy the new chain I gave you. I think it looked quite charming on you when I put it on you, but if it does not please you, I will call again and find you another as soon as I can. Shopping for it with you made me feel younger, and much more like myself than I have felt in a very long time. It was too long since we last went somewhere together, and I relish the opportunity to be out with you as we often had been before. I was immediately reminded of that time when we were eighteen and fifteen—per my reckoning at least—and we spend the full day together, drinking wine and amusing ourselves in and out of shops and then the night market, and got ourselves into more than a little bit of trouble afterwards. I bought you that silver bracelet you used to wear all the time, if you remember that. Those days seem to have disappeared away from us far too quickly. It seems so long ago and beyond my reach. I’m sorry I had but one sip today and seemed so unlike myself, but I hope you still had a good time.
I felt especially cheerful when we were together, Mae, but my high spirits have sunk since coming away. I know it must seem strange to you, my manner now, and it might have seemed like unhappiness still, but it was like a heavy weight was lifted off my shoulders, and I enjoyed it. I enjoyed you, as I always have before. I enjoyed you so much that I feel a greater unhappiness to be away. It seems especially empty now in my quarters without you keeping me company.
I have been feeling strange lately, and extremely weary. It feels colder, and I think perhaps I am ill with something. Sleep is still hard and a rare occasion for me. I am often awake in the little hours, reading things, but it doesn't help me any. I am glad you seem alright, at least. I wish I could come more often, but I don’t know when I would, and I wouldn't wish to have you fall ill too. It is selfish, perhaps, but I wish to see you often still. I wish I didn't always have to leave. I wish I weren't like this. I wish for so many things, Mae, but they are things I don’t know will come or not, and it fills me with a strange feeling. I would call it loathing yet there is nothing to loathe except perhaps the world tainted by the Marrer or—if I may be so bold—the One in his inability to mold me more perfectly. I wish the world would just stop for one day, so that I might have some rest for once. Perhaps with someone I care for greatly. I miss you.
There are too many more things to say to you and I cannot stand having you so near and being unable to speak with words. True, things are harder now to say; some are easier to put to writing and some easier to speak, but you know how it has always been, Mae—I shall tell you everything in time. I only need the strength for it. Please visit soon.
Yours as ever,
Image made by Landrem's player with Måns Björkman's Parmaite font.
