A rolled length of neat parchment, clearly expensive paper, denoting some form of wealth. Sealed only by a tied ribbon of crimson, the knot held down by a stamp of black wax. A coiled snake contained within the void-like circular impregnation. Upon unfurling the document, it would read:
Dearest Ashaia,
If there's one thing I want you to know, it's that this was not a decision I took lightly. And by that, I mean leaving you behind like this. Because there is nothing more I want in this world than to travel these endless lands with you by my side. But this is one journey I must take alone, for the sake of my own sanity. And before you go and assume you have done something wrong, I promise you, you are perfect. In all your beautiful imperfections, you are the woman I would strive to give everything in this world. A woman that the earth has not been kind to, that Eru himself dealt the world's worst hand, yet here you still stand. Ready to take on any challenge that comes your way. A stature of beauty that you are too selfless to recognize.
These past few weeks have been so spectacularly, well... Normal. Going to sleep with a smile on my face is not something I am accustomed to, I assure you, 'lest it's when I stumble home in a usual drunken stupor. But sharing my house, my life, with you has been oh so enlightening. For now I truly realize what it is I want the most in this world, and that is normality. That is a family, children, a legacy to leave behind and a collection of souls I would move heaven and hell to provide everything they could ever desire. And that's why I have to do this. I don't know if I'll be so stupid that I will tell you before you have a chance to unfurl this letter, but, these past few days, I've noticed some things:
I've noticed you've began to fall in love with me.
I've noticed I've began to fall in love with you.
And I don't know what to do.
In all honesty, my Raven, I'm scared. I'm terrified. Because love has never been kind to me, and I know you can relate. I have not had an experience where I can say that love has been fine. Pure innocent joy seems unavailable to a man of my stature. But each time I see you smile, each time I hear Ava giggle with juvenile joy, I can do nothing to stop myself being reminded of home. And it pains me to say it, but in my heart, I fear my home still sits with Tailia. With my Abriana. With the family I had, and lost before I even knew just how much they meant to me. And how can I truly be the man you think I am, the man you want me to be, the man I want to be for you, when my heart may very well sit elsewhere. You deserve so much more. A man who can love you without doubts, or fear of consequence. A better man than I could ever hope to be.
And that's why I need to go, and get out of this wretched place for a while. To rediscover who it is I am, whom I really want to be, and strive towards it. It may take a long while, it may take a week, but I do not know. I only know that I will not return until I am satisfied with the man I am. I do not ask you to wait for me. In fact, I don't want you to wait for me. Because I know, somewhere in this abyss of a heart, that I want nothing but the best for you. And there will be some man out there... Or, some orc, I wouldn't ever judge... A soul who could give you everything you deserve, and more. And as much as I want to be that soul in particular, perhaps I'm just not the man who can do that for you.
So, I ask you one thing, and that is solitude. Please, do not follow me. Do not weep for my absence, and do not fear for my safety. Tell Ava that I hope to one day make it up to her that I had to leave you both behind, and know that I hope to do the same for you, too. But know this... I will see you again.
And the moment I do... The moment that I see your beautiful, smiling face, will be the moment that makes this journey worth it.
'Til the next time fate brings us together,
Sincerely,
Written: 17th of Nórui; left resting on the pillow next to Ashaia's head, on the following morning, for her to find whenever she next awoke.
Last-known whereabouts: In the possession of Ashaia, having been found after she awoke.
