Dear diary,
I am terrified. I know, I should not say I am terrified, but I am.
Since I grew up not knowing a mother, I haven't a clue what to expect. I mean, I know the day will come when I will deal with an insurmountable pain for an extended time, but what else should I expect with being pregnant?
Yes, I've recently found out I am pregnant. I'd been dealing with feeling ill at my stomach for two weeks, I'd been moody, craving the weirdest of things... and I find out I am with child... what can I do?
I fear I'm not ready for a child, that I will pass when their time to enter the world comes, as my mother did--granted, she was murdered two days after my twin sister and I were born--but I haven't anything to refer to, to...
I know.
Truly, I do. I shouldn't be thinking like this, at all. My husband, and my father-figure, and so many others are willing to help, but... I'm scared to ask any advice from strangers. I shouldn't be afraid to seek a healer to help me through this, yet I'm absolutely terrified to...
I'm terrified that something will go wrong to where I lose...
I really shouldn't think like that... perhaps I should go and try to rest, if I don't happen to lose my stomach...
- Bretthera
