(A loose drunken scrawl, the page blotted with smears of ink)
I'm an idiot most of the times but a bigger idiot when drunk on whiskey. Went to the Pony and started drinking with Bill, trying to keep up with the man nearly twice my size and who has booze for blood. Big damn mistake. So big. Then she walked in. Of course...can't be drunk and trying to forget with out the ex girlfriend showing up too. It wouldn't be a party without that.
Make a long story short, because I'm probably gonna pass out after I puke. Bill walked me to the jail and left me to sleep it off. Tosie came by to check on me. I talked to her, I made her smile, it felt almost like old times, and then I was dumb. I told her I missed her and she ran away. I picked my guts off the ground again. I can't seem to get it through my thick skull that she is not ever coming back. Not this time.
I'm sleeping at the barracks tonight, even Thornroot's crusty blankets are better than trying to make it home in my condition. I'm lonely and I'm tired, I can't take this shit. Bet you thought you heard the last of this, notebook. Remind me, old friend, to stay away from whiskey and certain redheads.
