I'm seriously getting annoyed with my brother. He came by last night and told me that he had caught Gorlen paying a street urchin for certain "favors." He was quite blunt in his claim and at first I felt the stab of betrayal. I know that I'm new at this and maybe I am not enough for Gorlen, he's used to perhaps more experienced lovers. But then I watched Corrben as he spoke and I recognized he was lying. I don't care how good a gambler he ever was, he played enough tricks and pranks on me growing up that I recognize when he's trying to pull a fast one. I called him out on it and after going back and forth he finally stormed out, all but admitting he'd fibbed to me. I'm so angry at him, trying to break Gorlen and I up with such a slanderous story! This is getting out of hand, I don't go butting into his business with the girl from the Pony, I wish he'd just leave me alone.
I sat in my room, I was not in the mood to go out and I stewed on the details of what Corrben had said. Maybe it was a stretching of the truth, a fabricated story for he told me to doubt Gorlen's loyalty. But it did make me think. What if he gets bored? I mean, he lives in this world of exciting sellswords and women like Taala that have the ability to attract any man. I'm just a Breeland girl, a maiden before I met him. It's a nagging thought that plagues me, despite my confidence that Gorlen has feelings for me and I for him, that we love each other. It's so very new it seems unreal at times and I must remind myself that it's not a dream. How delicate a dream is though when all is needed is reality to wake one up.
Gorlen came over, looking tired and still a bit drunk. I had to ask him, I needed to hear from his lips and he assured me it was nothing but a lie. The street rat had stolen from him and he recovered his purse and what my brother had seen was merely him being more generous than he should have been by giving the wench 5 silvers out of charity. That was kind of him and I want to believe that is the truth. I looked into Gorlen's eyes and I knew, I have to trust him. If I doubt him now, what will become of us? He's done nothing for me to suspect he wants anyone else. I told him so and he was relieved, we held each other and he stayed over.
Also, I hope the neighbors don't complain to Mr. Woodham about the strange and repetative knocking on the walls in the middle of the night. I told Old Lady P it was a ghost but the look she gave me said the old crone isn't as rusty upstairs as I previously assumed.
