It might just be me or the fact that I'm now getting little sleep due to tending to the needs of my infant son but, I feel... on edge. As if I should be worried about something but I'm not. Which makes me even more worried, like I've missed something and I rarely do miss anything. Maybe it's just the tiredness talking, the pain in my leg feels worse than before but I do not care. I take it at my own pace and sit down when need be.
Though out of all of this, he's still in my head. I wonder what he's doing right now I wonder if he thinks of me, like I think of him. Being in his arms, kissing his soft lips being under his gentle and caring touch. Everyone believes I will go back to Lyndiel but... my heart is somewhere else and I just can't pretend to love someone I don't. She is the mother of my son but that is as far as it goes. I used to love her but times have changed my heart is with my Oak tree, forever and always. No matter how far away he is.
I wish I could go back and beg him to stay, beg him not to leave. But I swear if I ever see him again I'm never. Ever. EVER. Letting go. I've finally made up my mind and my happiness is with him!
Because he is my Oak tree.
"A mighty wind blew night and day
It stole the oak tree's leaves away
Then snapped its boughs and pulled its bark
Until the oak was tired and stark
But still the oak tree held its ground
While other trees fell all around
The weary wind gave up and spoke.
How can you still be standing Oak?
The oak tree said, I know that you
Can break each branch of mine in two
Carry every leaf away
Shake my limbs, and make me sway
But I have roots stretched in the earth
Growing stronger since my birth
You'll never touch them, for you see
They are the deepest part of me
Until today, I wasn't sure
Of just how much I could endure
But now I've found, with thanks to you
I'm stronger than I ever knew"
-The Oak tree by Johnny Ray Ryder Jr
