Rest still eludes me. I've reached a point that if I sit down, I'm likely to drift off, only to be woken again within moments, by the opening door.
Fiontann came by and brought someone I've not seen before. While I thought him a simple man at first, some words used by both of them have hinted that this friend of his may be one of the favoured. They both spoke of time and how he has enough of it. Felt as if I was being mocked.
He is another of the tomb robbers. We debated whether it had any purpose or if it was just an excuse to dig around in the dirt. He tried to tell me how finding old artifacts and scripts can help us to learn from errors of the past, yet he could not support his thought when it was argued against. He had no answer and hid behind excuses, finally admitting that he did it for his own pleasure and it had no greater purpose. My time wasn't wasted further.
I still felt disappointment. Much like that day with the woman back at the tavern, when I tried to debate her views, but she gave me nothing in turn. I miss sitting among the learned scholars with father, debating on our views from dawn to dusk. To learn and see things differently, open the mind and sharpen it. They made no excuse of things 'just being like that' or the lesser 'you wouldn't understand', they would give reason for their views, they'd challenge me. There was no right or wrong, only knowledge shared through the challenge of questioning. Either side would gain new understanding on the topic, whether they came to an agreement or not.
Maybe this is why I feel so restless. I've only myself to argue with, others simply buckle or make excuses to avoid explaining their answers. It's frustrating. If the mind is a blade, then mine lacks a sharpening stone. It's growing dull and the more I use it like that, the closer I come to danger of assuming I am wiser than everybody else. I need a mind that can challenge me, that can debate and not dismiss. Someone who can give reasons to their answers. I miss the enjoyment.
In this moment, I find myself missing the company of master Bíld and the challenge he'd offer. I've heard that letters have been received from him, so he's still alive at least. I can only hope that his studying is going well and that he's being taught proper.
* Cancel the delivery.
* Reply to miss Plumwood.
* Use up the rest of the pheasant.
* Have the coat washed and mask polished.
* Find someone for Harvestmath.
