Surrounded and tearing

There are five ropes. One is on my left arm, Gustine being captured and held hostages. One on my right arm, the group that has risen and already made an assault on Lady Ces. On my left leg, this Reaver returning and trying to kill people of Bree. On my right leg, the situation rising with Brikan. Around my neck..Amanda pushing to try and leave Bree in search of a man to kill for revenge. Tied to these ropes are horse and I feel as if I’m using all my strength to not be ripped apart. Trying to pull them back to me. I can see the toll this is taking on people around me involved. Aeg is stressed and hurting, Brandilyn is frustrated with me and physically hurt herself. When I spoke to Amanda, she reminded me..said that I failed to protect Brandilyn and cannot, protect anyone in Bree. She is not wrong, I have failed many people I must shoulder that burden. I am trying to keep people appeased and solve these problems, upon speaking with Brandilyn she said she was opening an establishment that she wants me to be there but I feel as if now she wishes for me to pick between her and Bree. I can not abandon the promise I made to protect it. Things were easier when I worked alone, did what I wanted and did not have to worry about others getting injured or killed around me. I have little choice now however and need to adapt. Gustine is the main priority. Why am I so driven to retrieve her..because when I have seen her..the attitude, kindness, and peaceful feeling she brings when she enters a room. She is the embodiment of the hope my brother and I had for the land here, for all lands. She represented what we wanted all people to be like and why we fought so hard and he died for. For that hope I will do anything, that is why I will keep pulling back on these ropes until Everything is safe.