"When I felt all of the strength leave me, and I fell to my knees on hearing the news, I wanted to cry but instead everything inside of me screamed for just one more day, one more hour, one more kiss, one more word, one more glance, one more moment and one more chance..."
Neyaa felt uneasy as soon as she received a summons to the Dawn Hall. She was not a member of The Bloody Dawn any more, but was still bound to them by friendship, love and not least the son she had with their Captain, Hardoleth. She came upon The Grey Warden as she neared the south gate of Bree and told him of her summons, speculating it may be regarding Hyrien's disappearance. Without hesitation The Grey Warden said he would accompany her, like her he was no longer a Dawner, but still lent his aid to them. They happened upon Deredan along the road, Neyaa was relieved when he said he would ride with her to the hall.
Fiontann, Rothlung and some others were assembled by the gate leading to the Dawn Hall, their faces ashen, a sense of gloom and foreboding began to climb about her, but she could not ever have been prepared for what Fiontann was about to tell her...
"Neyaa, I have some sad news and you must be strong" he began softly "The Captain is dead..." Neyaa heard little else for a time after that. Can one actually die from grief? It felt as though she might, a heart does not actually break, though her chest ached as if it was breaking, her legs crumbled from beneath her and she slumped to the grass and her tears began to flow like a river carrying her off but not to someplace better...
"NO...NO...NO..." she leveled at poor Fiontann, who bore the weight of it all. "YOU LIE FIONTANN" she screamed at him in denial. Deredan looked helpless, troubled himself, not for Hardoleth, but for Neyaa's plight as she sat upon the grass rocking back and forth, wretched from the anguish of it all.
After a time, they entered the Hall and Neyaa closed down, she sank down on the floor hugging her knees to her chin and began to recite the names of all the mearas she knew until finally she found her voice again and stammered "May I see him please Fiontann?"
When Fiontann opened the door of the chambers she once shared with Hardoleth, she was that child of fifteen again walking towards her mother lying upon her bed, only this time she walked towards a man she had loved so deeply that she had made no protest when he had left her cradling the son she had just birthed, so that he may live the bachelor life again, for that was the true nature of the man, and she was honest she was not entirely that different herself.
Neyaa looked at him through a vale of tears. He was wrapped in a blanket which she soon freed him from, he would not wish to be trussed up that way. She dampened some linen using water from the jug on the dresser and gently began to dab the dried blood from around Hardoleth's mouth "Ah look at you Hardoleth, you have blood on your face, let me clean you, I will tend you." She fussed with his hair, and his clothing "you look as handsome as ever love, no wonder you had so many women in your bed". She smiles faintly "you look so peaceful love, as if you are sleeping, I hope the end was not painful, I hope you went to the afterlife untroubled, you deserve your place there, you were not the monster many claimed, you were one of the best men I knew." "I have lived with you, loved you, and now you are gone, gone where I cannot follow and you may well have taken a piece of me with you, but you have also left a piece of you behind with me, our son, and he will be as proud of you as I am". "Your company will never let you be forgotten, you have touched my life and many others, for both good and bad."
Neyaa's voice trembled with emotion as she took hold of his hand "you are cold my love, so cold, let me warm you." She rubbed his hand in a feeble attempt to warm him. She leaned forward to kiss his forehead as he had done so oft to her "I will miss you more than words can do you justice, only you have managed to put a child into me that would live and our boy will grow up knowing of you and make you proud" She stroked his hair gently, composing herself, raising her chin, proclaiming "No woman ever loved you as I did, I will make that boast here and now, faults and all, I loved you unconditionally". "You once said unto me that your love would test me, bend me and at times it would break me, but nay my love, it never once broke me, only now, in death have you broken me". Neyaa kissed him upon his cold lifeless cheek, taking small comfort from how peaceful he looked "It is true all said and done, grief is the price we pay for love."
Neyaa reluctantly released his hand, sliding from the bed upon which they had enjoyed each other many, many times, stooping forward she brushed his lips lightly "Ferthu Hardoleth, hal, my Captain, my once lover and my friend, ascend to the Gods and show them what you are made of, for every time the thunder pounds the skies, I shall know it is your laughter in your merrymaking". With one final glance she tip-toed from the room and closed the door quietly behind her.
Downstairs, Deredan awaited her holding Branston, he must have slipped off to collect him. Her face was ashen, Taala, one of Hardoleth's daughters was there, Neyaa felt every single moment of her pain, the grief in the room was unmistakable.
Eventually Neyaa trudged home slowly, Deredan by her side carrying Branston, a numbness had fallen about her. Deredan was her strength, she loved him, he had always accepted the love that remained within her for Hardoleth, he loved Branston as if he were his own son, yet never for one moment would deny Branston his blood father.
The three of them climbed upon the bed and lay down, exhaustion finally granting Neyaa some much needed sleep, but not for long, she soon awoke and prayed to every God she knew that this was some horrible dream from which she had just awoken. Alas, it was not a dream, the cruel reality of the greatest loss to her and many others pierced her heart once more. She looked at Deredan with love in her heart cuddling Branston to him. She left the bed, opened the dresser drawer as quietly as she could so not to disturb them, taking a journal from within it. Quietly she crept into the other room and lit a candle setting it down upon the table and pulled up her chair. She dipped the quill into the ink and opened the journal and began writing....
'My darling son, these are the hardest words I have ever had to set down, they say time heals all wounds, but that presumes the source of the grief is finite....'
"When one person is missing the whole world seems empty.”
((oocly note. Firstly my apologies for the length of this story and the sentimentality of it. I am sure many skim read most of it or didn't finish it at all, so perhaps will not get to read this oocly note. Those that did persevere may find it rather smushy (probably Hardo more than any of you, I'm sure he will tease me about it), but that is how my character feels and I have to set that down, as cringy as it turned out. Most of the narrative is taken from the RP log though.
I speak for many when I say, Hardoleth was one of the greatest characters in Bree and will leave a big hole in the RP community. I was privileged to have RP'd his partner Neyaa for a long time, even if he led her a merry dance at times :). Love him or hate him, you will not forget or dismiss him I'm sure you will agree he left his mark.
His last will and testament was a blinder! Over 200 reads already xD
Thank you Hardo for the fantastic RP we've had, my character's would not be who they are without their interactions with you. You will be, and already are missed by many <3 ))
Hardoleth and Neyaa, attending Blince and Everlise's wedding, of course no woman would ever walk him down the aisle, and Neyaa for one would have never wished to.
